—Anonymous Or are you ready to start a conversation that addresses your new reality and expresses your desire for physical intimacy again? It sounds like the lack of communication and fear of speaking up and getting rejected is keeping you two from connecting. They may feel just as scared and awkward as you do and don’t want to initiate out of fear of doing something wrong. It may be scary to lay it all out there, but this is your partner. You got together and have stayed together for a reason. Just because things aren’t exactly how they were a year ago doesn’t mean they’re broken. The relationship may just need some TLC and some more open communication. Though addressing the issue may be scary, sitting in silence and stewing in your own mind only causes you pain and pulls you away from your partner more. Though I’m sure it would take some pressure off of you if they brought it up first, no one wins when you play the waiting game. You got this! As far as the mutual friend goes: don’t do it. If they can’t be trusted, don’t get them involved. That just creates a layer to the drama that nobody wants. Be gentle with yourself because I know this hurts, but you can’t force it to happen. Maybe you will run into this person organically and there will be a chance to chat, but I think you need space from the situation. It sounds like it’s consuming you, and that’s not healthy or productive. Unfortunately, it happened, you made your moves, and there’s not much else to do but try and forge ahead. If something’s meant to happen, they can reach out to you. You were the last one to initiate conversation, so you’ve done your part. I’m sorry you’re hurting and I hope you find the clarity you need to move on from this!
